Friday, February 6, 2009

Three Years Old and Surgery

Katlyn had her fist tumor removed yesterday on her third birthday. What a day! We had spent the previous night in a hotel and because it was a strange place, Katlyn would not go to sleep. She asked us if the hotel room was our new house? lol. She can really crack me up. Anyway so after only getting a few hours of sleep we awoke at 5am and set off for the hospital. Everyone was so nice to us and Katlyn. I think they were especially nice because they felt so bad because it was Katlyn's birthday. Before if Katlyn had to go for any sort of surgical procedure, we would have to bring her in the OR and stay until she was asleep. This time however, she (being so grown up now) walked on her own with the nurses. When she was on her way she neared the corner away from us and all the nurses were singing happy birthday to her. She never even looked back at her very distraught parents. My stomach tightened and I could feel tears welling in my eyes. I looked over at John and I could sense he was feeling somewhat the same as me because I could see the pain in his eyes. Our little girl is growing up. It sort of gives me this empty nest feeling. She doesn't need as like she once had. She is brave and she can do a lot of this all on her own.
My baby girl was going for surgery. She wasn't scared to be going down the hall with a bunch of strangers away from her father and I. She never even looked back.
So the surgery was about 2 hours. Johnathan and I sat in the hall amongst other family member anxiously awaiting their loved ones to also be in the recovery room. I fell asleep on John's shoulder and I think he also fell asleep leaning on me. A few times I was was awoken by what I thought may be someone coming to tell us our little angel was all done and everything went well. Each time becoming more and more frustrated and worried because the procedure seemed to be taking forever. Finally, I hear "good morning," and open my eyes to the surgeon. He told us everything went very well and what to expect from Katlyn. he also gave us directions on how to care for her cuts.
Awhile later we finally got to see our little girl. Usually waking from an anesthetic, Katlyn usually does very well. She says crazy things and really the best way to describe her is a little mini drunken sailor. This time was different though. She was very upset. She was screaming and screaming. I could once again feel my entire body fill with tears. I was so scared. It seemed as though she was in so much pain. While the nurse was getting a look at her incision sites, it really took me by surprise how large the one was that they took a tumor. I guess I didn't expect it to look so long.
About a half an hour later the anesthetic started to wear off and we soon realized that the cries from Katlyn were not pain, but just the anesthetic. What a relief. I thought we were in for a lot of terrible pain. Pain I cannot really describe.
So Katlyn was quickly released from the hospital and so far I have not had to give her anything for pain. I wonder if it's just because of nerve damage and things may seem fine now, but pain will come. Where they took the tumour it is so bruised and swollen. It makes me want to scream and cry. I am really having a hard time with the fact we took something that seemed so innocent and subtle away from her and traded it for a big gash, all swollen and bruised.
She seems fine though. This morning she said her boo boo hurt. She wasn't crying or anything. She just told me matter-of-factly. I gave her a little bit of codeine a she hasn't said anything again. I just don't want her to be in any pain at all.
So we go to NIH at the end of this month. Hopefully, by that time the tests from this tumor are back and we're told they got the whole thing. At that point I will get excited because Katlyn will no longer have 13 tumors, she'll have 12.